The other day I was walking up the street in the fake-sun. That’s when the sun shines but the wind chills you to the bitter bone! I was minding my own business, passing all the shitty cornershops that at first I hated upon coming to London but now have a novel affection for. I was happy I had been to the gym and that my clothes were fitting again. I looked up and smelt the air, there was a wind, if I had been born in London, I would think it was fresh air. Though I know better and I know how the air in wales makes every alveoli in your lung stretch out in receptive pleasure. Anywhoo, I saw this thing flying in the wind… a blonde, single strand of hair. It was quite far away and I watched it come closer and BOOM IT HIT MY FACE AND I WENT AHHH!!! AND SLAPPED AT MY FACE TRYING TO GET RID OF IT AND THEN IT WENT AWAY BUT I HAD A TERRIBLE FEAR IT WOULD GO IN MY MOUTH.
*gags*
Hair in my mouth, WORST THING EVER. Maybe not as bad as getting HIV or slipping and falling face first into dog turd, but pretty bad!
I didnt super freak out like Tom Cruise does in Jerry Maguire when he’s sacked, it was an internal freak out, no one suspected a thing…
And that was that. Sleep well dear abyss!
