The author of this blog is an award winning writer. Such awards include the prestigious “Utter Shit 2008 Prize” and “Stop writing and we will give money to charities” accolade in 1039 BC.
The author herself was created one foggy October morn when a badger accidentally walked over a lizard that was talking to a tree with magical powers which in turn set in motion the Prophecy of Caladria which forsaw that when a badger walked accidentally over a lizard that was in conversation with a magical tree, a nut on that tree would grow into a giant cocoon and out of it would fall the child of doom, a child with eyes of dirt and hair of dirt and skin of dirt that would roam the streets of London leaving destruction in her path. The prophecy of Jambon was thus triggered throughout London, a prophecy which stated that when a badger accidentally walked over a lizard that was talking to a tree with nuts and magical properties, a nut would grow into a cocoon and deliver a strange earth-demon unto the world that would move to London and invoke the prophecy of Jambon which would mean that a never ending sentence would be created by a passage of events that occurred when the prophecy of Caladria was fulfilled by a badger walking accidentally…
So in summary (because we all like a good summary…unless it is us who has to write it), here lies an account of a boob.
